Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
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