the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
