when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
i think i just lost a toe
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
