TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
