i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
