if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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