hotel room ftw
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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