and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Randomize
