so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
MIDGETS
????
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
