That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
What drink are we having for lunch?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
