I need help removing her.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
