she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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