I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize