well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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