my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
