What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
