I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
