Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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