I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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