Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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