How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
