She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
