i need an iv and a liver transplant
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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