My first STD was from a foam party
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites