There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
