No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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