Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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