There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
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There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
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Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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