walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
