OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
