everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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