she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
