You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
