You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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