Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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