Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
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