i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
