Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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