my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
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