My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
