it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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