you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
