This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Your tits are I can't wait for
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
