Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays" http://tfl.nu/5s21
  Replies (38) Good night (3696) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen http://tfl.nu/zk0c
  Replies (55) Good night (1206) Bad night (4369)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive. http://tfl.nu/9k83
  Replies (22) Good night (1110) Bad night (5608)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.

  (1-716): View more from New York

  momma always taught us never to change for a boy..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack. (1-716): momma always taught us never to change for a boy.. http://tfl.nu/3cjy
  Replies (17) Good night (6548) Bad night (1388)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers http://tfl.nu/9dwx
  Replies (1) Good night (2289) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since. http://tfl.nu/058n
  Replies (7) Good night (1453) Bad night (4931)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila. http://tfl.nu/6g2r
  Replies (25) Good night (2178) Bad night (1338)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em http://tfl.nu/8kd5
  Replies (3) Good night (490) Bad night (1900)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed. http://tfl.nu/qkqo
  Replies (2) Good night (1782) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that. http://tfl.nu/ou7s
  Replies (6) Good night (2215) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Most creative movie date proposition... ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes? (708): Most creative movie date proposition... ever. http://tfl.nu/whek
  Replies (6) Good night (1958) Bad night (1130)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused. http://tfl.nu/bg7n
  Replies (6) Good night (743) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth http://tfl.nu/mes3
  Replies (4) Good night (324) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions http://tfl.nu/22up
  Replies (1) Good night (751) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore. http://tfl.nu/mvza
  Replies (2) Good night (630) Bad night (213)

Randomize