We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
