any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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