am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
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He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
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I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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