Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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