I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Success! We fucked roommates!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
