To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
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I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
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There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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