this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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